When a baby comes into the world, we think of it as our naïve ball of joy who needs to be groomed and moulded into something spectacular by us parents. We take it up on our shoulders to school him from day 1 to become a logical human being without even realizing that the baby itself is learning with each passing day. Kids learn basic ideas of things with simplest activities like when you bath them, they learn about water is a flowy substance, when you switch the light off of their room, they learn what that white, glowing halo does and so on. While you may think that they know nothing at the time of birth, they are intuitive little sponges who are assimilating everything happening around them. And as parents, you are the conduit or facilitators who have the harnesses in their hand to make your child’s everyday a learning adventure to raise him as a rational thinker.
As parents, the first thing that you got to do to raise a prudent one is incorporate intentional parenting. As in, be microscopic in your approach with intentionally bringing up stuff to increase their rationalizing skills. Let’s see how you can do that.
1. Naming problems: For toddlers and preschoolers (aged 3-5), validating and elucidating problems and emotions is the first step. Try emotional coaching with naming emotions they experience-feel/want/have/think/need etc. Let them verbalize their problems by naming emotions and what they ‘understand/think’ about those problems. You can start his naming of problems and feelings while role-playing or story-book reading sessions. As a parent, your first task should be to develop their ability to identify problems and express them. But, let them do it themselves. When your child encounters a challenge, give a “think-aloud” benefit to your child. Let him ask aloud “Where are my socks? In the cupboard, on the table or in the balcony, where are they, mumma? Also, don’t dilute your words to make it easy for your child. Expect your kids to learn words like fascinating instead of amazing, banal instead of regular/boring, and brawny instead of strong. Don’t change your vocabulary as it is critical for developing young minds
2. Give them the opportunity to think about the whys, hows and whats: After naming the problem, the next step comes to analyzing them with the ‘WH’ words. ““What is the hard part about building blocks or climbing stairs or swinging on the swing?, “How can I pick up the toy kept far away from my reach?” “Where are my eyes, nose, lips on the face?, “Why do I have to clean up my pile of papers?” Building an analytical and logical mind is not difficult if we start understanding the rationale behind any problem with such questions. You can develop this skill by encouraging reading in your child right from toddlerhood (ofcourse, he would stutter but you can begin by storytelling, reading him simple words using the syllable and associated sound. Try to use books with illustrations) While doing it, raise similar WH questions about the course of action that the protagonist is most likely to take or what could be the possible ending or moral of the story type of questions. Let them come up with creative, innovative ideas. Reading the newspaper to him/her is spending time and allowing him/her to hear spoken language. As he/she grows a little older, you can build up anagrams, crosswords and puzzles around letters and numbers. Additionally, if they say something absurd, don’t correct them. Ask them the rationale behind what they said. “I am going crazzyyy mumma?” “Oh really, honey? What does crazy mean by the way?” “Ummm, I think it means I don’t like it and my head hurts.”(have a good laugh at their innocent explanations too at times) Kids see the world through innocent and wondering eyes.
Parent: You will soon turn 3 years old
Child: touches both his ears and says “No I have two Ears”
Instead of writing off the child or endeavoring for perfection, see the world through their eyes and you shall discover a whole new world.
3 Brainstorming outcomes: It may sound too much for a toddler but it can be seen in subtle ways in his/her behavior. For example, try throwing a ball under the bed and ask him to see from where it comes out. You will be surprised to see that he will try all possibilities and check at all the exit points/ sides of the bed. Similarly, try playing hide and seek with a toddler and call out his name to come find you. You will be amazed to see that he checks all nooks and corners of the house to follow your voice. In fact, if there is a toy on the slab of the kitchen which is too high for him to grab, he might use his bat to push it down or drag a stool to reach it. Bottom line being, encourage such behavior in your toddler where they can come up with multiple solutions to their problems. Imbibe the idea of ‘If knocking on one door fails, try knocking on all ten’ You can do this by giving them a variety of options in terms of books, games, colours to choose from. You can also try showing them how a certain activity can be done in 5 different ways. Like how can you run along a field in 10 different directions and yet come to the flag in the center.
4. Talk to them like grown-ups: Respect your child as an individual from day 1 and make balanced switches between baby-talks and normal talks. This is not to say you should not imitate their babbles as an infant because that does help them develop language skills. However, do treat them as if they are rational, thinking individuals throughout childhood. Because they see themselves as you see them. And they have more self-confidence if you are not doing all for them and treating their point-of-view as important.
5. Make regular activities a creative, learning experience for them: While wiping the dishes, ask him to club all bowls in one stack, plates in another and spoons in yet another. This helps them learn matching similar objects and how to order things. To make them learn addition, ask him to stack the blocks one over the other counting each and smashing the pile as he forgets the subsequent number. Mundane play or activities can teach more if catapulted with some fun.
Try these and sing along with your kids, parents:
Think left and think right, think low and think high.
Oh, think the thinks you can think up, if you think to try!